My Dairy

17 September 2026: Getting my stickers in a twist

Orroight! It ent right, alright?! My son, who's only a nipper, saw these discussting stickers what ANTIFA had stuck up all around the street we live in. "Ryan smells of poo!", it says. I dun't smell of poo, I had a bath a couple of weeks ago!

He's only young, so little Adolf couldn't reach to take them all down, and he couldn't even use the cherry picker, as that's been impounded since Elon ran over that lefty in Stirchley.

It makes me mad. How bloody dare people come round to areas WHERE THEY DON'T EVEN LIVE and stick things up ON PROPERTY WHAT DOESN'T BELONG TO THEM, deliberately to CAUSE OFFENCE!!!! This is my area! OOZE TREATS?? ARSE TREATS!!

End off.

August 2026: Brighton

In June, I went to Brighton with the lads and Ben (Raise the Colours Oxfordshire) Cullen (who I hardly know) to bring our message of peace and unity to the weirdos and lefties of Brighton. While we was protecting are women, one woman smacked me on the fist with her face (proably a lesbian), so I had to go back to attend court. Yeah! They claimed it was my fault, even though I was NEARLY KILLED by someone who gave me a small cut on my lip which almost RUINED my good looks, what many people say makes me the BRAD PIT of Patriotism. Obviously I pleaded not gillty.

Anyway, while in that cesspit of moral decline I saw this brand new building what looked like a mosque, completely pissing in the face of are country's history and culture. Imagine how angry I was, when a voice in my head told me it was actually a muslim LBGTQ+ vegan bicycle co-operative! Obviously, I was too furious to actually find out what it was, but I bet it was absolutely rammed with tofu-gobbling ultra-far leftists wearing green socks and having gender-affirming pilates classes. Absolute DISC RACE. That's where we are, guys: Are country is lost!